November 14, 2012
11:07am
California
So, I was just having some alone time and as I was reading one
of my current books entitled “A Man
Worth Waiting For: How to avoid a bozo” by Jackie Kendall, I was moved
to write this blog. In this book I am
reading, it compares traits of Boaz (read the book of Ruth in the Bible to get
more insight on the story), to traits of a modern day “bozo”. No person on this Earth is perfect, so if you’re
looking for a perfect person, well, keep watching Disney movies. But it’s
really time to stop staying in these meaningless relationships/flings just to
fill a void or “just to have fun.” It’s ridiculous. Been there, done that and
it’s NOT what you want to do nor is it worth it.
I’m really over hearing the whining about not being able to
find a good girl or a good boy. Often times, we aren’t even in the position to
receive a “good” guy or girl if they were presented to us. Let me say personally,
I was one of those whiners. I was that bitter female. I was that typical and
simple minded female that just thought I knew how to keep a man. I just knew that
the reason behind whatever relationship or fling that ended, had nothing to do
with me. I just knew I had it all together. GIRL PLEASE.
It’s really important that we start examining ourselves
before we even worry about getting into a relationship. Start making sure we
are whole and stable enough to be in a real relationship.
LADIES, Stop blaming these guys for what YOU ALLOW. Stop expecting some “grown boy” to treat you right when you’ve
seen one million and one red flags. If you decide to stay longer, then shame on
you. Get your standards up, and know where and where not to compromise. Stop
looking at these broken celebrity relationships, and start getting some real,
worthy counsel and examples. We have to eventually stop making all these
excuses. We have to stop sulking in our “loneliness” and REALLY truly work on
us. Let God start molding you, so that when that right young MAN comes along,
you will recognize him and are then able to be that WOMAN that will be a prized
possession to him, not that girl that drives him absolutely crazy. We have a
job too ladies. STOP worrying so much about finding a man. He needs to actively
and effectively pursue you, so get you some business and a life, and consume
your heart with Christ. Trust that HE will give you the desires of your heart
and that HE knows what’s best for you. So, stop letting these relationships and
flings make you bitter. Learn from them. Stop making the same mistakes, and start
really guarding your heart! (Proverbs
4:23) Be happy. Smile. And rest! Work daily on a better you.
Also, Ladies, we have to stop beating the men down and build
them up. We can’t expect them to grow if we are trying to be so independent. This
isn’t to say, be needy. NO! But, definitely stop babysitting these young men
because as THE MAN, they are expected to lead. Stop stumping their growth of possessing those
leadership qualities, by settling and not requiring that they step up to the
plate. Make sure that this young man is submitted to Christ before you go falling
head over hills. I know personally, from the experiences I’ve had, I will NOT
be able to fathom the thought of submitting to a man that isn’t actively
pursuing Christ. I need to be able to respect the man that I am thinking about being
with. That is among one of the top characteristics I will examine. I don’t care
how much you “say” you love Jesus or me, I should be able to see this through
action. I should be able to see the fruit on your tree. (Galatians 5:22-23) Are we constantly talking about sex and straying
away from Christ, or are we encouraging one another sincerely and pushing each
other towards Christ? How does this
young man respond to conflict? How does this young lady respond to conflict? How does he/she talk to you? How often does he/she
keep their word? How has he/she shown to be trustworthy? Don’t be naïve. As I
said before, often times we see red flags, but refuse to acknowledge them just
because we “want to be loved.” Ha!
Take heed young men, women are lethal
too! Ladies don’t be that one that the Bible warns these young men
about either. (Proverbs 5:7-14, Proverbs
6:23-35, Proverbs 7, Proverbs 31:3) Also read the story of Samson and
Delilah and the story of Jezebel. There
are so many examples in the Bible. Don’t be that promiscuous girl ladies. Stop
it! Remember this: “The very downfall of a man can be in the very hands of a
woman.”
Ladies: Desire
to be a lady that a man truly respects. Desire to be that lady that a man knows
is valuable. Desire to be a man’s wife and queen, not a boo thang or side
piece. Gentlemen: Be that man
that respects women. Value yourself as a
man to only want a woman that respects herself. Stop leading girls on. There’s a quote that
says: “The biggest coward of a man is to awaken the love of a woman without the
intentions of loving her.”
All in all, I just want to encourage everyone to embrace your
single stage. Take this time to really let God do some work within you. Ask Him
to make you more gentle. Ask Him to start implanting the fruits of the spirit
within you, and start practicing them now. Water them and let them blossom and
shine through you. Get rid of all that bitterness. Get rid of all that pride. Crash
the pity parties and really truly work on being a better you. It’s so
beneficial. It’s time to really grow up. Get some standards and keep them.
Close your legs and stop opening legs and open your Bibles and some useful
books.
Your time will come! Trust God and be
patient. 
No comments:
Post a Comment